More Nothing

I have it on good authority that holiday calories don’t count. I thought this meant whatever you eat from Thanksgiving until January 2nd was free. My Weight Watcher’s points tracker hasn’t been filled out because I haven’t been consuming any points at all since the fourth Thursday in November. Or so I thought.

I had to have a semi-physical and TB test for work this morning. You know what that means. I had to be weighed. And while it IS cold outside and I’m wearing winter clothes, I don’t think the nurse bought my standard lie. The one about my clothes weighing about 30 pounds. Though I was wearing tennis shoes and I’m pretty sure they’re close to five pounds. Each.

I refuse to divulge what the scales said. I will say, however, that I’m firmly a size six. Figuratively speaking. And that was probably a silly size to chose for my illustrations because if I ever do lose the weight I want to I’ll end up being somewhere between a negative two and a negative four.

So now I’m thinking it’s only the specific holiday foods that have no calories. But that’s kind of confusing because let’s say I go to Starbuck’s for a White Chocolate Mocha. That’s available all year around so I would have to count those calories. BUT if I were to order a Peppermint White Chocolate Mocha – a holiday special item – then it would be free. Or what if I were to make sugar cookies in the shape of something other than a holiday figure, maybe a butterfly or a spring-time flower, would that still count as holiday food? You see my bemusement.

Thank goodness the entertainment food rules are clear cut. For example, lunch in tandem with a movie is included in the calorie free items along with the popcorn, candy, etc.

I am drinking a Coca-Cola Cherry Zero right now. That’s gotta count for something.

*****

Taylor has a pulled trapezius. I’m sure you already know this, but if not, a trapezius is NOT a swinging apparatus, but a muscle between the shoulder bone and spine. Anyway, he’s apparently done a good job of it because he’s in quite a bit of pain. Unlike my drama queen daughter, he’s usually pretty tough and it takes a lot to make him complain*.

Now I have a standard rule that says unless you are puking, bleeding profusely or running a fever you WILL go to school. I need to add semi-paralyzed. Poor guy could hardly move last night and ended up sleeping in the big green chair downstairs with a heating pad.

Somewhere in this blog I have established my lack of compassion. More likely it was Todd who pointed it out, but whatever. It’s true. I have never claimed to be good nurse material and today is further proof. I understand the boy can’t move without it feeling like someone is ripping the muscle in his back. Which means I’m having to wait on him. I don’t do waiting on him very well. I’m sure I’ll endure, though. hahaha

I did get a glimpse of my little punkin’ head this morning, though. He had walked into the living room, managed to get the Christmas tree lights on and fell asleep on the couch. Gave me all kinds of warm fuzzies. Maybe I should think about that every time I start to get frustrated.

*I need to clarify here. Taylor complains all the time.

Me: Empty the trash and take it to the curb.

Taylor: *Heavy Sigh*

Me: Clear off the table and load the dishwasher.

Taylor: *Heavy Sigh*

Me: Clean up your room.

Taylor: *Heavy Sigh*

But he doesn’t usually complain about being sick or in pain.

*****

Taylor’s school band concert is tonight, but he can’t lift his trombone let alone move the slide. Since we’re not going to that I’ll be going to the preschool Christmas program. Please pray that I can get up off the floor of the stage in front of all those people without embarrassing myself.

And we’ll be having Jesus Birthday Cake. Nothing says “holidays” more than that so I really hope I get a corner piece!

25 Comments

  1. Misty on December 19, 2007 at 4:12 pm

    I accidentally found your blog and I am happy that I did. I am subbing with Bloglines.

  2. Terri on December 19, 2007 at 4:25 pm

    I used to count food items your way….. and look at me now!! 🙂 I completely get your “compassion” thing with grown children/spouses that are sick. They used up their quota when they were little (children) or when you were first married (spouse). There’s only so much to go around! My Joey is having surgery on his knee today, and coming home for “convalescent leave”. I’m sure that I’ll be looking for an excuse to go to work in about 2 days! He’ll be home almost a month, and he hasn’t lived in my house that long since 2000!

  3. Monnik on December 19, 2007 at 6:02 pm

    I have issues with waiting on sickies too. I do it, but it feels wrong.Have fun at the concert tonight!hope Taylor’s shoulder is better. Poor kid.

  4. The Daily "B" on December 19, 2007 at 6:37 pm

    Ugh… I seriously dislike waiting on the ill… well not all the ill… that sounds so insensitive and I don’t think I can get myself out of that.I do hope his back/shoudler feels better. BTW – What’s Jesus Birthday Cake? Is it a special kind of cake?

  5. The Daily "B" on December 19, 2007 at 8:23 pm

    Okay, yes I clarify that statemen.. lol. If you have cold or maybe a little teeny fever, Get your own drink and kleenex. If it’s more than that, I’m at your beck and call. =)

  6. Sing4joy on December 19, 2007 at 8:36 pm

    Hey – we can’t ALL be nurses. If we were, there would be no one to keep the world in good reading material. Found your blog through HisGirl. Bookmarked ya! Hope your young man heals up quick and starts waiting on himself again. haha.

  7. Lynilu on December 19, 2007 at 8:38 pm

    Have you ever noticed that the doctor’s scales weigh you at least ten pounds more than the home scales? I weigh at home, go get weighed at the office, come home and weigh again, and it’s ALWAYS that way. Therefore, you probably can cut whatever gain you saw AT LEAST in half! Honest!:D

  8. Jenster on December 19, 2007 at 9:22 pm

    Misty – What a great accident! Glad you found me and I’ll be checking your blog out ASAP!!Terri – What kind of surgery? And where? CA or TX? And don’t tell me you’re not just a little happy he’s going to be home!!Monnik – Thanks!Deb – It’s just a birthday cake for Jesus’ birthday. It had candles and we sang “Happy Birthday Dear Jesus”. :o)Sing4Joy – Yea! Another new friend!! And absolutely on the nursing comment!Lynilu – Great!!! In that case I think I’ll have some ice cream!!

  9. Kris on December 19, 2007 at 9:56 pm

    Hey Jen,I hope that you had fun with the preschoolers, their programs are always great whether they go as planned or not. Sorry about Taylor, I hope he feels better soon. That stinks about him missing his concert though.

  10. Lynilu on December 19, 2007 at 10:13 pm

    LOL! You go, girl!!!

  11. His Girl on December 19, 2007 at 11:10 pm

    I can’t tell you how much I enjoy your blog. Makes me so happy to see what you’re posting. keep it up, girl! adding you to my blogroll 🙂

  12. His Girl on December 19, 2007 at 11:11 pm

    whoops! I had already added you! so, i will be adding an EXCLAMATION MARK!!!also, you need to go ahead and tell us your Lake Perris story. there’s no turning back now!

  13. Colorado Writer on December 19, 2007 at 11:33 pm

    Jenster,I’ve been a bad friend lately and haven’t been by to check up on you and your family!HUGS and hope the New Year brings happiness and joy to you!

  14. beans on December 20, 2007 at 11:09 am

    I hope the preschool program went well.About the Jesus cake. My birthday is suspiciously close to Christmas . . .and my family ALWAYS made me share my birthday cake with Jesus. The cake always ready Happy Birthday Jesus and Beans (ok, so it didn’t say beans because that is a fake name meant to keep me anonymous, but you get the point) He always had top billing too, never Bean and Jesus. Sometimes, in desperate times I would have to share with my brother-who’s b-day is the 29th, AND Jesus.For once I would have liked a cake that just said Happy birthday to me. I mean I like the guy and all, but a girl’s gotta have her cake!! I’m feeling a blog post coming on

  15. Tanya on December 20, 2007 at 3:17 pm

    I like the idea of a Jesus Birthday Cake. Too many people don’t focus on Him.

  16. radioactive girl on December 20, 2007 at 4:11 pm

    I hope he feels better soon!We always make a baby Jesus birthday cake and blow out candles and everything.I think holiday food in any shape does not count as long as you are eating/drinking it during the holiday season. Which may be why my clothes are feeling a bit tight lately.

  17. Jaime on December 20, 2007 at 5:03 pm

    Jesus Birthday Cake? I’ve never heard of this! Interesting. Of course, me being Jewish, it makes sense that I’ve never heard of this. 😉 About the calorie thing – I totally agree that most holiday foods (in my case, latkes and chanukkah cookies, etc) simply dont count. BUT, in case they DO, Starbucks does have that handy calorie/fat calculator on their website, so you can manipulate drink ingredients to see what gives the least amount of calories….genius! 🙂 Happy Holidays, Jen!

  18. Mama P on December 20, 2007 at 5:52 pm

    “The one about my clothes weighing about 30 pounds.” LOL. You really are very funny. Hope the shoulder gets better soon – for him and for you, you BAD nurse, you!And what the heck is a Happy Birthday Jesus cake? I have to confess, that while I’m Christian, this is the stuff that to me goes too far, but it’s probably because I don’t have a clue what it is and am waaaay off in my opinion, so tell me. Maybe I’ll get educated and make one for my agnostic husband just to piss him off.Hugs.

  19. Gretchen on December 20, 2007 at 8:54 pm

    I think you’re perfect nurse material. Have you ever known doctors or nurses w/kids? The kids are “never” sick. Probably because mom/dad see “real” sick so often that just a measly cold or flu symptom doesn’t quite make the mark. 🙂 This reminds me of 3 Weeks With My Brother by Nicholas and Micah Sparks. They wrote about how they would come in with hideous, stitch requiring wounds from playground battles or some such thing, and their mom always just gave them a bandaid. Sounds like they never blamed her, either.At any rate, I hope Taylor feels better soon. Muscles are so slow. Love your weight management ideas. I feel like i’m incorporating quite a few of them into my “lifestyle plan”. In fact, I ate a peanut butter cookie from Starbucks yesterday, but I was walking while I did so. Can’t count, right?

  20. creative-type dad on December 21, 2007 at 2:01 am

    My mom was like that too about going to school.One time I was bleeding and she still made me go!!I never forgot that….

  21. cubmommy on December 21, 2007 at 3:08 pm

    Just wanted to wish you a Merry Christmas!!Won’t be around much until after Christmas.

  22. Eileen on December 22, 2007 at 1:58 am

    I hope Taylor is feeling better soon. So sorry he had to miss his concert, I hope he wasn’t too upset. You never know what will happen at a Preschool show. That is why they can be so much fun!!!By the way, I heard, from good authority, that holiday calories definately do not count after 12/21/07. Live it up and enjoy, you deserve some treats!Have a Merry, merry christmas!XOXO

  23. Lisa on December 22, 2007 at 9:33 am

    Poor bubby… Hope he feels better soon! :o)I’ve eaten two boxes of Almond Roca. I am NOT getting on the scales.

  24. Kelly Malloy on December 22, 2007 at 4:07 pm

    Christmas calories definately don’t count! LOL!

  25. Shauna on December 23, 2007 at 3:16 am

    Ooh, poor Taylor. Though your rules sound suspiciously like my “if it’s not bleeding you’re fine” statement. I hope you got your corner piece.

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